What if you stopped trying to do everything?
...so you could finally get round to what counts? This week in What I’ve been reading, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman.
This probably isn’t the book you think it is. Rather than being just one more self-help book full of hacks to make more efficient use of your time, Four Thousand Weeks is a philosophical exploration of our own finitude. That is, given that on average we have about four thousand weeks to live on this planet, how do we want to spend them? What really matters?
Oliver Burkeman challenges us to choose what we do with our lives more intentionally, to spend more time pursuing things we enjoy for their own sake in the present moment. The process of doing so takes a shift in how we perceive and relate to time and our illusion of mastery over it. Let go of that, and we might just find freedom.
What’s it all about then?
Four Thousand Weeks is based on two important but uncomfortable truths:
In the “absurdly, terrifyingly, insultingly short” average human lifespan – about 4,000 or so weeks – you will never be able to accomplish all the things you would like; and
Even if you could, it wouldn’t matter in the end because, in the words of John Maynard Keynes, “In the long run we are all dead.”
How you respond to these truths will probably determine whether you enjoy the rest of the book. If you find them a mix of depressing, terrifying or something that makes you want to go and bury your head in a pillow (or a bowl of ice cream) then you should probably read on. If you really don’t care, it may not be the book for you.
Having established these truths, Burkeman invites the reader to embrace them and harness them as a reason to change. After all, avoiding them doesn’t make them any less true.
The first half of the book – Choosing to Choose – is about embracing our limits. As Burkeman points out:
“The real problem isn’t our limited time. The real problem…is that we’ve unwittingly inherited, and feel pressured to live by, a troublesome set of ideas about how to use our limited time.”
When we can let go of being slaves to our schedules, put down our obsession with the drive to do more and be more efficient, we might escape the constant feeling that we are not doing enough – or indeed that we are not enough. Efficiency is really a trap. We will never, in fact, be on top of things, so why do we still believe and behave as if we will?
Burkeman encourages us to become better procrastinators (music to my ears 😂) and to continue to work on our patience and choosing what matters over our ever present distractions. Nothing revolutionary here, and still, the way Burkeman presents the arguments for these, illustrated with stories, it landed for me in a way it hadn’t before.
The second half of the book – Beyond Control – goes a layer deeper. Burkeman opens with the wonderful ‘Hofstadter’s law' which states that “any task you’re planning to tackle will always take longer than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter’s law.” It’s unsettling to think that the activities we try to plan somehow actively resist our attempts to tame them. This isn’t to say don’t plan! But it is to acknowledge that however hard we try, we really can’t control how things will go much of the time. And more than that, quite literally anything could happen, so becoming too invested in any single outcome is a recipe for unhappiness.
This part of the book also encourages us to be present, to stop trying to get through things and enjoy where we are right now. The concept may be simple, but Burkeman acknowledges that does not make it any easier to do. It also explores rediscovering – and redefining – rest, embracing discomfort, focusing on connection with others, a further look at impatience and ultimately accepting our own insignificance. This last part walks a fine line between being freeing and being depressing, it might go either way for you!
He closes with a set of reflective questions to help make some of the concepts in the book more concrete, then in the appendices he throws a bone to the productivity hackers reading the book (if they’ve got this far) with Ten Tools for Embracing Your Finitude.
What are the highlights?
While I do like practical books, even more than that I enjoy books that challenge me to think differently.
In Four Thousand Weeks Burkeman contextualises the brevity of our lives in a new way and manages to frame that as something to inspire us (rather than the opposite). It left me with a sense of carpe diem, and got me thinking more deeply about what matters.
It’s all too easy to get stuck on the hamster wheel of life, racing against some invisible adversary to try and catch up, or even to get ahead sufficiently to be able to somehow earn our enjoyment. This book is a valuable reminder of the futility of that approach, told in an engaging and mostly uplifting way.
Anything you didn’t like?
In a book that is by nature somewhat philosophical, Burkeman’s writing does wander at times, and he sometimes repeats himself. This may frustrate some, though for me it gave space and time to reflect rather than having a kind of “I’ve made my point, let’s move on” style.
I won’t lie, there’s also a part of me that wanted more practical suggestions. Though that’s more about my wants and perhaps something of a misunderstanding of what the book was about when I picked it up. What Burkeman wrote is probably more what I needed, even if it didn’t feel like it at the time. Still, if this is you too, be warned – and I’d still encourage your to stick with it.
Why should I read it?
Many of us spend our lives being busy. Trying to crack the magic code of trying to do more in less time, be more efficient, hack our days to maximise every minute available.
The value in Four Thousand Weeks is turning that on its head. It’s not about better time management, but about embracing a different approach, a different mindset. When we finally accept that we can’t do everything, and thus that perhaps we need to stop trying, we give ourselves the chance to find greater enjoyment and more peace. If you’re someone who struggles to let go of the internal – or external – pressure to try and do everything, this book is essential reading.
What’s the one thing you’ll do differently as a result of reading this?
I’m going to go back through the reflection questions in the book and have another look at my goals for 2025 in that context. I suspect it may not change the goals, but will instead be a healthy reminder of a different approach to going after them.
As a teaser, the one I haven’t been able to get out of my head is:
“In what ways have you yet to accept that you are who you are, not the person you think you ought to be?”
Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals
by Oliver Burkeman. Published by Allen Lane in 2021.
Available at Amazon UK, Amazon US, or Bookshop.org. (#aff links)
Have you read Four Thousand Weeks? I’d love to hear what you thought, so click here to add a comment or your own review:
Join me for another Small Stuff, Big Impact Workshop
It’s back! I’m running another Small Stuff Big Impact Workshop on 29th January at 12.30pm GMT.
Unlock the hidden power of small, everyday interactions with "Small Stuff, Big Impact: Discover the transformative power of micro-interactions" – this live, online (and complimentary) workshop will introduce you to the world of micro-interactions – those small, seemingly inconsequential moments that have a profound impact on your team’s engagement and performance. If you’re leading or managing others, mastering these moments is essential to building stronger relationships and creating a more motivated, connected team.
In this 60-minute introductory workshop, you will:
🌟 Learn what micro-interactions are and why they matter in leadership.
🌟 Discover how small adjustments in communication, tone, and behaviour can create a ripple effect, transforming your daily interactions into powerful tools for engagement.
🌟 Learn how to translate theory into action – you will leave with practical suggestions to start making subtle but effective changes right away.
Register for your place via this link, and please do share with anyone you know who might like to join.
Places are limited to ensure a truly interactive discussion, so sign up now to avoid missing out.
See you there!
And finally…
If you already feel like January has been going on forever, you’re not alone. How on earth are we only half way through? 😩 Time is a funny thing, right?
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Thank you, and see you next week!